Comentariile membrilor:

= windshield?
Carmen Fenesan
[12.Apr.05 14:08]
sounds like rock lyrics :)

i would switch the second line around a bit, "as if time would throw away his skin" (or "shed away").. i think it has a nicer rhythm.
also maybe "... invade my dreams"... just a thought.

I like the second part quite a lot (i like rock lyrics :)

= thank you
Florin Hulubei
[15.Apr.05 20:06]
Thank you for the suggestions and the appreciations. I generally do not change anything in my poems! Come again!

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Înapoi !

= windshield?	Carmen Fenesan [12.Apr.05 14:08]
sounds like rock lyrics :) i would switch the second line around a bit, "as if time would throw away his skin" (or "shed away").. i think it has a nicer rhythm. also maybe "... invade my dreams"... just a thought. I like the second part quite a lot (i like rock lyrics :)

= thank you	Florin Hulubei [15.Apr.05 20:06]
Thank you for the suggestions and the appreciations. I generally do not change anything in my poems! Come again!