Members comments:

= Intriguing really, but...
John Willy Kopperud
[06.Sep.08 14:42]
....in the title; pray animals, that won't do. The correct spelling is PREY. PRAYING is a religious activity.
Secondly: The line; so cripple very heroes does not make sense. Would "the very heroes so crippled" make a better line?
Thirdly the next line; "The shirt is already rended."
I perceive the word IS here as unnecessary. Please quit it.
Cheers from Willy
= danke!
Marius Surleac
[06.Sep.08 14:51]
Hi Willy! Thanks for the tip with the "prey" (haven't seen it). Secondly, "the" is more fine and as I said some time ago - the romanian version inflicts something else, and the "is" stays better - I think!

Cheers from Marius!

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= Intriguing really, but...	John Willy Kopperud [06.Sep.08 14:42]
....in the title; pray animals, that won't do. The correct spelling is PREY. PRAYING is a religious activity. Secondly: The line; so cripple very heroes does not make sense. Would "the very heroes so crippled" make a better line? Thirdly the next line; "The shirt is already rended." I perceive the word IS here as unnecessary. Please quit it. Cheers from Willy

= danke!	Marius Surleac [06.Sep.08 14:51]
Hi Willy! Thanks for the tip with the "prey" (haven't seen it). Secondly, "the" is more fine and as I said some time ago - the romanian version inflicts something else, and the "is" stays better - I think! Cheers from Marius!